Leaving...

I am leaving on a trip

for the first time in our marriage.

{Rusty usually is the one who leaves on trips for work}

My hope is to enjoy.

to laugh.

to have fun.

to rejuvinate.

BUT

as I leave I feel a sadness.

this would have been my first trip leaving Kaden with his Dad.

(would I have left? maybe. probably not.)

I stood in this room swaying like I used to do when I held him

remembering S.O. clearly what it felt like.

the L.O.V.E I felt

_______________________

I can't help but think about how my life has changed

without him physically here.